One reason this was a surprise to me is that until recently I rarely had clients talk to me about work-related stress, at least not to extent that they have in the past year or two. Employees of high-tech companies have experienced several rounds of challenging events including layoffs, threats of layoffs, pressure to increase production, and an overall exhausting workload. After several difficult years, folks are tapped out and are looking for ways to gain the upper hand over their own stress and reclaim their quality of life. While people do not come to me asking for stress reduction, some have found that as the process of coaching develops, it helps them to manage their stress.

The reasons for coaching being linked to reduced stress at work are different for each individual, but I believe the common factor is that one-on-one coaching requires people to examine their current situation and shift their perspective. One example of this is a client who takes the demands of colleagues very personally, resulting in stress that she takes home, much to the dismay of her spouse and children. Communication coaching can help her clarify the priorities of her boss and coworkers so that she can develop more realistic expectations. She may then be able to find areas where she can respond differently to these expectations or negotiate responsibilities. Her clarity and confidence can also help her to set boundaries so that she is able to satisfy the needs of her work role without sacrificing quality time with her family. In this example, nothing about the work situation has actually changed, but new communication strategies result in a fresh perspective and therefore reduced stress.

Another example of how a shifting perspective can help reduce stress is a client who habitually holds back from speaking up in public at work, resulting in lost opportunities to contribute and thus waning confidence and greater stress. Coaching can help by examining why he is refraining from piping up, which often has cultural roots. It can then help him identify opportunities to be heard, leading to positive feedback, and increased confidence. Instead of being known for being silent, the same individual can transform into a proactive contributor who enjoys speaking in groups. Once again, the external situation did not change, but the attitude and behaviors of the individual transformed causing real external consequences.

Like everyone else, I am ready for the economic and business environment to ease up. For the moment, stress is a fact of life for members of the high-tech world. It’s gratifying to know that positive communication strategies can help employees flourish even during challenging times.

Self Awareness

One major reward of communication skills training is that the process requires you to become more aware of the areas where you can improve, and perhaps more importantly, the areas where you are already strong. This may seem backwards to you since so much importance is typically put on improving weaknesses. I have noticed that people often have only a vague sense that they need to step it up in the communication realm, but have few specifics. This can lead to worry or avoidance of the whole subject. Being part of a workshop, seminar, or coaching can help clarify the situation in several ways. First, setting personal objectives for a course allows you to do your own honest self assessment. Secondly, discussing your course objectives with a manager can result in more insight into how others see you. Thirdly, you will receive feedback from fellow participants during training tasks that are designed to be simulations of what occurs at works. What frequently happens is that participants become more aware not only of areas for improvement, but also of the specific areas where they are viewed as successful communicators and can build on their unique strengths to deliver messages more powerfully.

Improved Skills

The most obvious benefit to taking a communication course or participating in communication coaching is that improving your communication skills allows you to increase your value as a professional. A typical participant in Language By Design training is a highly skilled professional who is extremely valued by their organization and who could benefit from an upgrade in their communication skills in one or more area. It makes sense that communication is often identified as a key area for growth considering that technical education in the sciences and engineering does not place a great deal of emphasis on communicating, yet employees of today’s work force have to work intensely with members of their own department as well as serving on cross functional teams. Communication skills training can target the areas that are keeping an individual from contributing their best in such situations. These skills could include organizing one’s thoughts quickly in high pressure meetings, addressing business rather than purely technical concerns, and taking charge of off-topic discussions. Communication skills enhance technical expertise.

Better Relationships

It shouldn’t be surprising that taking part in a seminar on communication skills often results in improved relationships. I have seen individuals in courses apply the principals we are exploring to their interactions with their managers, customers, peers, and reports with great success. One reason this is true is that when we start to examine how different people communicate, individual preferences and styles come into focus. For instance, when an individual’s manager has a straight forward, direct communication style and the individual has a more indirect, subtle style, there may be misunderstandings; exploring these differences allows for creative solutions like choosing to start a discussion with a quick overview of key points so that both people are on the same page immediately. While better work relationships are a major motivator for workplace training programs, a side benefit I’ve seen again and again is that relationships at home are often positively affected as well. Frequently, participants in active listening courses tell me that the techniques they’ve learned are working wonders with their spouses, and I once had a client tell me that after studying these techniques, he felt he was better able to communicate with his 10 month old daughter!

Improved self awareness helps build stronger communication skills, which leads to the enjoyment of better relationships. This chain reaction culminates in the benefit that my clients most often highlight: increased confidence. Although taking a course or engaging a coach is an investment, it is an effective way to enhance already strong technical skills and make you a more well rounded, valuable employee.

Use the ten tips below to determine if you or someone else is a good candidate for one-on-one coaching.

1. There should be a defined goal. Sometimes this includes two or three objectives, one being the primary one. The coachee and manager should agree on the goal.
2. The coachee should be highly motivated to work toward making a shift in the specified areas.
3. The individual should enjoy the process and be excited about it. Both the coach and the coachee should feel that they are a good fit and they should be comfortable working together.
4. The coachee should have the time to dedicate to working toward the objectives, over a period of 8 to 10 weeks. This includes time for meeting weekly with the coach as well as weekly assignments, which may take approximately 1 to 2 hours per coaching hour.
5. The coachee should be coachable, meaning able and willing to honestly reflect on the feedback s/he has received and consider how to make progress in those areas.
6. The individual should be a highly valuable employee who merits the investment.
7. The coachee should have opportunities to apply the learning points at work, and preferably, to receive feedback on how well s/he is applying them.
8. There should be an on-going learning plan, which the coachee will be dedicated to maintaining during the months after the coaching has ended so that the learning points are reinforced.
9. Often the individual will be more suited to coaching due to the privacy it affords. This may include managers who do not feel it is appropriate to attend a group seminar with his or her reports, or the individual may simply feel they can make greater progress by working intensely toward their objectives with a trusted coach.
10. Most importantly, the coachee should have a positive outlook on the coaching process and how it will add value to his or her own career as well as the organization.

One-on-one coaching is not for everyone. However, for the right candidate, working with a coach can unlock potential and help tap into the confidence needed to attain greater levels of success at work. A former coaching client recently shared that she felt the coaching she participated in with me a few years ago was one of the most valuable things she had done for her own professional development. She said that it was not always an easy process, since it requires hard work and an honest self assessment, but that for her, it was well worth it.

If you would like to discuss whether or not coaching is a good option for yourself or one of our employees, please call Karen O’Neal at (408) 309-2508.